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Where did thank you go?
Several weeks ago I was watching a vlog and the host made the following statement, “I stopped answering email questions for free because 9 out of 10 responses never received a thank you.” She would often spend hours on one email to answer questions about traveling with kids in Europe, unpaid, just out of the goodness of her heart and the love of travel. Inevitably these emails would rarely get a return thank you. She had done extensive travel in Europe with kids. She had a skill. She had experience. She was giving it away for free and she could not even get a thank you more than 10% of the time. She got tired of it and opened a consulting business. The business is thriving. Who knows if she is getting the thank you response now, but she is getting paid for her time. And no, this not me. But, I respect her bold move.
What have we become as a culture where we can’t thank someone for doing something for free?
We thank the waitress, she gets paid and she gets a tip.
We thank our employees for working hard and then we pay them.
We thank our parents for babysitting. Ok, they only get paid in love, but you get the idea.
So why doesn’t the majority thank those people who share (for free) their expertise, their lives, and their lessons online?
I started asking others who share their expertise online if they were experiencing this same no “thank you” scenario, maybe it was just her situation. The answer is the same, 9 out of 10 never say thanks. Every, single, time.
Since social media, more than enough people are willing to give their knowledge away for free, which lends to a common trend of why pay for it. Ok, but what about at least a thank you when someone gives you something valuable for free? This perplexes me. I know this does not exist in the physical world because I still hear thank you, merci, and gracias all the time. But, here in cyberspace appreciation is a bit diminished.
We make it a habit in our business from the beginning to respond to everyone who emails us, we can’t always do the same on our social media platforms, but with email, we do try our hardest. Sadly, I can concur with the 9 out of 10 statistic. Early on in our WorldTowning adventure, I gave it all away, hours and hours and hours responding to emails, PMs, comments, etc. I was more than willing to help others who wanted to follow in our path. However, the emails grew as our social media presence, expertise and business grew, but the hours in the day did not. I now can end up with 30-50 inquiries per week just via email. We finally had to come up with a viable solution because I could not spend several hours a day answering questions for free and not doing my other work. We inevitably developed our consulting business where we help other hopeful travelers with the logistics surrounding full-time travel, homeschooling to university, living abroad, language learning, running a remote business, and more, it was a great decision. I still respond to emails, however, after several back-and-forth emails, I suggest they purchase a consulting chat. Some do, some don’t and that is ok. Still only 1 out of 10 say thank you.
This leads me to those who get angry because they think it is our job to respond to their emails for free. When I suggest they pay for our expertise after already giving a bundle of free advice they are disgusted. Only a small fraction gets angry, which should be noted. We have managed to last out here full-time traveling for 8+ years in several different modes of travel/homes for a reason. There is a price tag attached to that knowledge for sure. In the beginning, I was not confident enough to say that out loud (nor did I have the experience to back it up after only several years of this WorldTowning lifestyle), but now I can say it with the utmost confidence. There are very few full-time travelers who have lived outside their home country for close to a decade. I can name most of that, that is how small the number is. As a result, it is a skill set with a level of expertise that warrants compensation if the questions require an extensive response.
Another scenario I hear often is how social media influencers should always be available irl for their community. Several years ago we were hanging with a group of sailors in the Balearic islands and one woman was shooting her mouth off about it being “the job of the YouTuber to talk and be accessible to those who want to engage.” She had recently shared the same marina with a very well-known YouTube sailing channel and she thought they were distant from the community because they got an apartment instead of staying on their boat. Will tried to school her a bit on the fact that our job is to produce vlogs and although it is nice to engage with followers, it is not our job. The schooling fell on deaf ears sadly.
YouTubers give their time to produce vlogs for free. In full disclosure most YouTubers do not make enough to survive, they do it for the love of it…us included. Of course, there are unicorns, but they are a small handful. Then often they are expected to give their free time to in-person drive-bys from followers. When do they have time to be a family, run errands, self-care, exercise, etc? We are not a huge channel so I cannot begin to imagine what it is like to constantly be recognized, but I am sure not everyone is kind and respectful when you get that big. These influencers must draw the line, understandably.
For a small YouTube channel I am shocked by how much we get recognized. The conversation usually goes like this, “we love your channel, THANK YOU so much for sharing your life and your honesty.” The “no thanks given” attitude does not extend to the in-person connections, at least from our experience. So weird. I guess I still don’t understand this cyber world fully, and maybe I never will but I am happy it is a very “thank you” oriented community, at least irl. And yes, if you do see us out in the world come say “hi.” We do love meeting all of you!
In the sailing world, we have been the lucky recipients of so much knowledge and sharing from those who have gone before us. We have even paid mentors ourselves, thank you Jamie and Behan of Sailing Totem's TRU Coaching. We did not get to where we are today because we did it all on our own for free without saying thank you or no one would work with us again. In many cases, we offer up gifts to show our appreciation for free help. Last month we gifted a bottle of Baileys because a new friend helped us with our dinghy and engine. Did we have to? No. Did he expect it? No. Was it appreciated? Yes.
So today I want to take the time to say a huge THANK YOU in all caps to those of you who continue to show up here for this newsletter. I do this because I love it and love sharing this lifestyle choice. It does not feed our family but brings me joy and creates a stronger community. THANK YOU to those who have donated and continue to do so. I see you and I appreciate you. Just a big ole THANK YOU group hug. I am working hard to normalize the thank you because it seems to have disappeared in the cyber world.
Let’s all go out and thank someone for something free they gave us today.
Would love to hear your thoughts? Do you notice the same? Or do you completely disagree and see something totally different? Will always says, “I live on a boat, I am a bit out of touch.” Maybe I am a bit out of touch and the thank you is plentiful in the cyber world.
Have a fabulous day.
xoxo,
Jessica
We launched 8 Trips in 5 days!
This week we rolled out our 2024 group trips and one surprise 2025 trip. I am so damn excited to share them with all of you. In 2024 we will travel with you to French Polynesia, India, Peru, Costa Rica, South of France, Paris, Japan and one more surprise location coming over the summer yet to be released. A big THANK YOU to everyone who has already signed up for trips this week when we released them. I will be sharing more information on social media about these trips, but for now you can look over the details here.
Where are we now?
Still in the San Blas islands of Panama. For real time updates catch us on IG.
To learn more about us, our mission, and our business you can visit us at WorldTowning. To view our most recent group trip offerings head on over to WorldTowningvoyages.com. If you are interested in booking a coaching session to realize your travel dream, schedule it here. If you want to follow the travels of our WorldTowning family, you can find us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, TikTok
Thank you Jessica & Will for your generosity and your courage. Your insights have changed our lives.